Friday, July 23rd, 2010
eastcliff richard in his secret hideaway
The news that Ramsgate’s Waitrose is to have its alcohol licence reviewed has sent shivers down the spines of the island’s Krug-quaffing classes.
Even though you can’t actually buy a bottle of Krug there, the potential closure of the only outlet where you can get a tipple that isn’t, in effect, fizzed up anti-freeze has made Thanet’s discerning DFLs morose. What’s even more galling is that the licence review has apparently been sparked by an endless stream of indigenous, tattooed, pit bull tuggers who seem to think that the supermarket’s alcohol section is a free service, along the lines of the morning methadone at Boots.
For me it highlights the increasing divide between the Ile de Thanet’s growing numbers of glitterati (comme moi), who can’t wait for Primark to be replaced by Harvey Nics and a branch of Farrow and Ball to open in Ramsgate high street, and the consonant-deprived, third generation unemployables who think that Wilkinsons is an upmarket outlet, and the 99p shop massively overpriced.
So to redress this shocking shopping imbalance, I’m today consulting with my team of Mary Portas style retail specialists about opening my own store here in the Millionaires’ Playground. To be called ‘The £99 Shop’, it’ll stock everything the man (or woman) in the street with a Platinum Amex could need.
I have every confidence that, within a very short while, I’ll be minting it!
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Hi Richard,
Have you missed the Bottleneck in Charlotte Street Broadstairs? We have more top class fizz than you can shake a stick at!! Vintage Pelorus from Cloudy Bay Vineyards, Nyetimber Classic Cuvee & their Blanc de Blanc, four different Prosecco from £6.99 bottle to £9.99 bottle. We run great special offers and we send wine to the Highlands of Scotland in 1989 we were the UK Off Licence of the Year, we have been runners up in the Young Wine Merchant of the Year yet another Uk competition. The shop has been in the same hands Chris & Lin Beckett for almost 23 years we are Thanet’s Best Kept Secret.
You don’t expect me to schlep all the way to Broadstairs, do you???!!!?!!!
I think I’m right in saying they deliver – free on a case or more.
Hi Richard
It’s worth the trip to see us call in when you are next in sunny Broadstairs. We deliver all over the island & by arrangement to other parts of East Kent. By mail order to Wales, Scotland & all parts of England. Hope to deliver to you soon!!
All the best from the Bottleneck
ECR wrote ‘You don’t expect me to schlep all the way to Broadstairs, do you???!!!?!!!’
Go on, you have a lovely coastal walk from the EastCliff to Broadstairs to pick up your quality fizz from the Bottleneck and the bonus is that on the way back you can join the resident homeless chap in his copse in King George VI park while away the hours downing fizz and special brew.
The homeless chap? I thought that was ECR’s true identity.
Biggin’ up The Bottleneck: they delivered copious quantities of alcohol for the de Plume housewarming party, plus free glass hire. Lovely, helpful couple.
The homeless chap? I always thought he was Richard Branson on an anon day out!